Watching a child suffer and slowly fade from this world is among the heaviest crosses a Christian couple can bear. In such seasons, the heart may still whisper the age-old question: Why, God?
To deny the pain would be untrue, for sorrow pierced deeply into the souls of Foster and Grace Okwu, leaders in the Kaduna Zone of the Christian Couples Fellowship, as they watched their son, Joshua, endure years of physical and mental affliction before he finally slept in the Lord.
Yet, they did not grieve as those without hope. Though tears flowed and weariness often lingered, their suffering was carried with quiet faith, steadfast trust, and the assurance that even in the valley of anguish, God remained present, sovereign, and good. Those years were furnace years, gruelling days marked by exhaustion, tears, unanswered prayers, and the silent ache known only to parents watching their child suffer helplessly. Still, beneath the weight of sorrow, God was quietly refining their faith. Through Joshua’s pain, they discovered that while God may not always explain suffering, He never abandons those who suffer.
Foster and Grace never received the answers their hearts longed for: why Joshua had to suffer, or why they had to let him go so soon. Nevertheless, through their tears they encountered God not merely as One who explains suffering, but as One who remains good, faithful, and sovereign even when understanding fails. They came to see that God did not stand distant from their pain, but walked gently through it with them.
It is this journey through pain and faith that Grace preserved in words to encourage the Body of Christ, especially couples bearing unspeakable burdens. With tender honesty, she gathered memories time and grief had blurred for her husband, an effort Foster commended as he marveled at her recall of details he could scarcely remember. From those ashes emerged Out of My Ashes — a 168-page testament of sorrow and hope — unveiled alongside the launch of the Joshua Foster Foundation in Kaduna on Saturday, May 16, 2026.
Reviewing the book, Mrs. Dorcas Ikiri, proprietress of Real Pearl Academy, described Out of My Ashes as “a raw, deeply moving account” of a mother caring for a terminally ill child while struggling beneath the weight of grief, uncertainty, and hope deferred. Yet, she noted, the book still radiates faith, warmth, and “a quiet kind of victory.” According to her, one of the book’s strongest messages is the reminder that God’s ways rarely align with human expectations. While many tried to explain Grace’s pain and interpret heaven’s silence, the story reveals that God often writes His answers in ways humans cannot fully grasp.
The occasion drew brethren and members of the Christian Couples Fellowship, alongside distinguished guests and dignitaries. Mrs. Amaka Okonkwo represented the wife of the Deputy Governor of Kogi State, while the Kaduna State Commissioner, Ministry of Women Affairs was represented by its Permanent Secretary, Alhaji Hayatudeen Mohammed. Mrs. Helen Falope chaired the occasion on behalf of her husband, Dr. Segun Falope. Together, they gathered not merely to launch a book or unveil a foundation, but to witness how God can lift beauty from brokenness, and how even the fiercest fires of sorrow can, by grace, give birth to hope.